The Healing Journey

September 1, 2023

Janet was inconsolable after her father died. Nothing could help her. No assurance that things would get better, that her father was in a better place, or that “this too will pass.” Her father had always been the defining force in her life. He took her to Yankees games, he helped her with her Social Studies projects, and he discussed politics with her every morning after he read the headlines.

She refused her husband’s request to seek counseling. She didn’t want to go to the bereavement program at her parish. And she got angry when her daughter criticized her for not “shaking it off” after two years.

Sadly, it reached a point where she didn’t talk about her pain anymore because she was convinced no one understood or even cared. They had moved on with their lives. Her family was convinced she was on the verge of an emotional breakdown, and there was nothing they could do to help because she shot down every suggestion they offered.

Then, a family friend sat down with her, a friend who had given her advice in the past and who realized Janet was trapped.

Grief is painful but at some point we have to confront the pain and start on the healing journey. There’s no simple solution. There’s no magic formula.

She said to Janet, “How do you think your father feels about this despair you’re suffering?”

There was a long, painful silence, until she answered, “I’m sure he’s upset.”

“He loves you so much. I know he wants you to get better.”

There was more silence. Her friend finally said: “There’s no easy way. But promise me one thing. When you say your prayers tonight, you’ll ask him to help you. Ask him to show you the way. Ask him to lead you where you’re supposed to go. And keep asking him every day.”

Janet promised she would do that and she did. Knowing her father was there for her gave her the first hope she had in a long time.

***

Even in our darkest hour, hope always lies within reach.