June 5, 2023
“Love is a springtime plant that perfumes everything with its hope, even the ruins to which it clings.”
– Gustave Flaubert
One semester, when Lenny taught his public speaking course, he would have the students stand up and give an impromptu speech about the “Best Advice I Ever Got,” and the topics were inspiring. One girl’s mother told her she couldn’t love anyone else until she loved herself … and her history of bad relationships was an indication that she didn’t love herself enough. One guy’s grandfather pulled him aside as he was headed off to college and said, “Don’t be afraid to fail, even fail big because you’ll learn more from your failures than from your successes.” Another girl, who suffered from anxiety, said her therapist told her to take life a day at a time and breathe deep when she felt an attack coming on.
Lenny loved to listen to them because it was apparent the students took the advice their parents and grandparents told them to heart.
But Lenny scoffed at advice. Easier said than done, especially after his sister died suddenly and the loss crippled him emotionally. They were the closest in age in a large family, She was too young to die, and her death reminded him of his own mortality.
Friends and family tried to console him with hackneyed advice like “She’s in a better place” and “Time will heal you.” But instead of offering him consolation, it only angered him because the advice sounded glib and insincere. He preferred they say nothing rather than give advice that didn’t come from the heart.
Months passed, and his healing journey was a rough one, until one day quite unexpectedly he felt a little better. Something changed. His first thought in the morning and his last thought of the day wasn’t about his sister. As the haze seemed to settle and he reached a higher elevation on his journey, he looked around. The sun was breaking through the clouds, and he saw a new day. For the first time, he had hope. A thought came into his mind and settled in his heart and the thought was “She’s in a much better place.”
***
You may think your situation is hopeless, but just when you least expect it, hope will surprise you.