The Healing Journey

September 21, 2025

It’s strange how memories, sometimes decades old, can offer insights into people we have lost. With the passing years, we look at them through a different lens and often gain a new perspective that can change our lives.

During dinnertime discussions, things occasionally got out of hand when Tony was growing up. Being Italian, his family was inclined to speak in loud voices, which his friends from more reserved families misinterpreted as “yelling.”

One time, his mother was furious, angry, unhappy — pick one — because Tony didn’t want to go to Sunday Mass. He was a rebellious teenager, like most young people during the ’70s, who sat in judgment of the adult world.

“I’m not going to church! They’re all hypocrites!” he sneered. That word was one of his favorites, and it fell from his lips like the condemnation of an Old Testament prophet.

Then, his mother took off the gloves and bellowed: “That’s WHY they go to Mass. Because they’re NOT perfect … like you!”

The playoffs ended. Mom 1, Tony 0. So then, they settled down and enjoyed their pasta primavera. Not only was his mother a world-class cook, but he discovered she was a theologian and a Catholic apologist. He was blessed to have her, but didn’t realize it at the time. Only years later, looking back on those occasions, did he have that epiphany. And today, he proudly and humbly counts himself as one of the hypocrites who go to Mass.

Yes, it took a long time after she died for him to truly realize how important his mother had been in fortifying his faith. If she hadn’t stood up to him back then, he realized now that he would have no faith.
©J Pisani

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